'Oh boy, you should have probably left it': 8-month pregnant woman is forced to use broken driveway gate that she shares with her in-laws, her father discovers the gate and fixes it to help daughter, her elderly father-in-law claims that it wasn't broken

Author image for Emma Saven
Emma Saven
Aug 2, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

Have we perhaps not thought about this as deeply as we should have? 

We've always known that there must be some sort of unspoken competition between mother-in-laws. Who makes the better chicken soup? Who gives the best grandma cuddles? But we didn't think about whether this type of rivalry exists between father-in-laws too, until today!

There must be all types of masculine elements that affect a father's ego: Making sure they can always protect their children and provide for them. So when that is challenged by another man with the same goals, we begin to see an armwrestling of the egos. However, every father is different, and when a large age difference comes into play between the two men, it is expected that their offerings may differ. 

Is it fair to compare two soon-to-be grandpas when one is in his 50s and the other is nearing 70? There is no way that they will be able to fulfill all the same hands-on roles, but that doesn't mean they both can't give the one thing their kids and grandchildren will care about most…

Love. 

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  • When this young, hands-on father comes across his pregnant daughter's broken gate, a gate shared with her in-laws, that's been dragging on the driveway for months, he takes it upon himself to fix it. This does not go down well with her older father-in-law, who's been claiming that the gate is perfect and doesn't need fixing, likely because he was unable to fix it himself. 

    Now tension lies between the two men as they go face-to-face in the battle of Who’s the better father…

  • 01
    "Her father-in-law is feeling emasculated because I'm fixing and renovating and he doesn't do that stuff"
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITAH for fixing my daughter’s FIL gate?

    My daughter and her husband live in a separate house in the same yard as his elderly parents (I had her at 19, they had him late
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  • 03
    40s). They have a big gate at the end of their driveway. For years the gate has been dragging and you have to lift it to open and
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  • 04
    close. I mentioned to the FIL several times I could fix it and he kept saying "it's not broken" but the top hinge was bent and
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  • 05
    crooked and out of place. I grew up on a farm and knew this was a 30 second job. I'm doing renovations at my
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  • 06
    daughter's house as she's very pregnant with her first child and I have to go through that stupid gate many times a day. Yesterday
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  • 07
    when I went through and was frustrated so just took a bar I had in my truck and adjusted the fence so it didn't drag. Just
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  • 08
    swings nicely open. Took under 30 seconds. Just then he came out from around the corner. I said "fixed your gate" and he was
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  • 09
    clearly irate and responded "it wasn't broken". I went up to the house and told my SIL and daughter who both responded
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  • 10
    with "oh boy, should have probably left it". I was like "well you're 8 months pregnant and lifting a gate multiple times a
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  • 11
    day... and I'm your dad. I fixed your gate. She said the FIL is really feeling emasculated because I'm fixing and renovating and he doesn't do that stuff...
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  • 12
    Cheezburger Image 10536001280
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 13
    So am I really the a hole? I get so frustrated when men get hurt feelings over stupid sh like that. Fix the GD gate!
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  • 14
    slothy_slothy Nope.. FIL can get over himself. You're taking care of things he should be doing on his property do your VERY pregnant daughter can move around safely.
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  • 15
    ncjr591 Next time just fix it and don't mention it.
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  • 16
    Maschamari NTA. Your daughter's FIL has some ego problems and you should not have to tiptoe around them. However, in the interest of keeping your daughter's life as easy as possible, the next time you fix something
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  • 17
    don't tell him. If he figures it out, fine, but don't offer the information. If he's that sensitive about his manhood he might prefer to pretend like things magically fix themselves.
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  • 18
    Acruss OP how could you do that?! Didn't you know that he said that he will fix it himself tommorow, 6 years ago???
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  • 19
    Kyra Heiker Don't pander to someone else's insecurity. He well get over himself instead of can insisting that your daughter be inconvenienced to save his ego.
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  • 20
    Retired BSN There are times when one gets too old to either want to or be capable of doing some tasks required for proper home maintenance (ask me why I'm renting, not owning a house any longer). When you're in that situation, it's really nice to have those tasks taken care of by others, whether you pay for them or not.
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  • 21
    FIL not being able/willing to do repairs that are needed means that someone else is going to have to do it, and that FIL is going to have to admit to himself that he just might be getting older and not as independent as he used to be.
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  • 22
    ShabbyBash Good grief! My father gave me his battered old car since I was riding a motorcycle - the only vehicle we had between us - at six months pregnant. Whoever wanted to feel emasculated/feel neglected could take a hike.
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  • 23
    Louie Avalon Mac Whose property is the gate? If it belongs to your daughter - and you had authority - NTA If it belongs to FIL and you knew you were overstepping then of course YTA
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  • 24
    Sigmageddon69 Honestly, if the gate wasn't working right and you fixed it, that's just being a good dad · not some kind of power move. I'm a father too, and if something around my kid isn't safe or working properly, I'm fixing it, no matter whose pride might take a ding.
    via Sigmageddon69
  • 25
    You didn't replace the man, you replaced a faulty hinge. If the father-in-law feels 'emasculated' by that, maybe the issue isn't the gate. At the end of the day, your daughter's safer, the gate works, and nobody had to wait six months for a lopsided DIY job. That's a win in my book.
    via Sigmageddon69

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house Awkward grandfather father-in-low wife masculinity quick fix ego fixed broken memebase family DIY pregnant dangerous gate Father
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